A Toast To Bill Brasky, err, Tiger Woods

• We once had a bachelor party for Brasky. He ate the entire cake, before we could tell him there was a stripper in it.
• Brasky still believes in Santa Claus, and he wants to put him in porno films.
• Darryl Dawkins has a summer home in Brasky’s groin
• He makes every woman that sleeps with him refer to him as Bear Bryant.
• Brasky named the group ShaNaNa. They did not want to be called that.
• He thinks the Iron Man is gay
• They use Brasky’s foreskin as a tarp when it rains at Yankee Stadium.
• He sired a baseball team.. an orchestra if you count the bastards!
• He hated Mexicans! And he was half Mexican! …….And he hated irony!
• He did 3 tours in ‘Nam…… I was in Corpus Christi on business a month ago. I had this eight foot tall Asian waiter, which made me curious. I asked him his name. Sure enough it’s Ho Tran Brasky!”
• Did I ever tell you about the time Brasky took me out to go get a drink with him? We go off looking for a bar and we can’t find one. Finally Brasky takes me to a vacant lot and says, ‘Here we are.’ We sat there for a year and a half and sure enough someone constructs a bar around us. The day they opened we ordered a shot, drank it, and then burned the place to the ground. Brasky yelled over the roar of the flames, ‘Always leave things the way you found em!

Cheers Tiger/Brasky. I hear you’re a real son of a bitch, but damn if I don’t respect you. There are more Brasky quotes here. Need more? And Lefty is supposed to match up against this?