Zeke and the Knicks: Where Amazing(-ly Awful) Happens

I apologize for those who frequent The Legend but couldn’t care less about the NBA, let alone the New York Knicks. But, if you live in this town and pay attention to sports, not writing about this team is…well, it’s like Eddy Curry being in a room with a box full of cupcakes…we simply can’t resist.

Watching this team over the course of this season has been the equivalent of having a front-row seat to the most fantastic explosion imaginable, or watching the most ridiculous movie you’ve ever seen. One of those films that is so terrible that it’s actually phenomenal. Classics like “The Replacements” come to mind, as does anything starring Keanu Reeves who himself is awesomely bad.

But, through it all, the most compelling part of the soap opera continues to be our main man Zeke. As previously related on this here blog, Zeke is a constant source of post-game entertainment via his unforgettable and mind-boggling press conferences. Last night was another classic example.

Following a pathetic effort from the opening whistle to the final horn last night in Dallas, Isiah answered random questions from the media. During the conversation, he dropped another classic apparently praising Eddy Curry’s conditioning program this season. Marc Berman of the Post has an amusing recap of the “game” and the Curry conditioning exchange, after which one Knicks beat reporter incredulously blurted out “Really?” Zeke replied leaning on his trademark idiot logic: “I’m very comfortable with the weight he’s played with and we’re comfortable with the weight he’s at.” Stuff like this is nothing new for our feather-brained leader.

This would be another one of those AFLAC duck moments of dumfoundedness for me. What planet is Zeke living on? It immediately made me think of an interview I heard a few months back on ESPN Radio. The host had Bob Thornton on, a former Knicks player, now a scout with Seattle. Thornton was asked what he thought about Curry. Paraphrasing here, but he basically said that Curry could and should be a top five offensive post player in the League. The host asked him why we thought Curry wasn’t there. Thornton replied that Curry is 25-30 lbs overweight. Point being, he’s out-of-shape and can’t run or jump. Something every Knicks fan who’s watched a game this year could tell you in :30. Zeke is somehow missing it.

To top it all off, Zeke continues to stand – actually, mostly sit – on the sidelines idle. Silent. Stoic. Or, even worse, with that dumb half-smile expression on his face. You know what, Zeke? Cry on the bench. Throw a chair. Get tossed out of 10 straight games. Do something that indicates you have some sort of competitive bone in your body. Didn’t you use to play on Pistons championship teams?! What the hell gives?

I can’t take it anymore. Unfortunately, this team is a 12-car collision that I simply cannot peel my eyes away from…