Top 10 Sports Movie Quotes…To Use While Watching Sports
By Cecilio's Scribe on Jun 01, 2009 with Comments 61
Inspiring Much of the Top 10
When this all makes sense, it’s magic. I think you know what I’m talking about, but just in case…here’s the top 10 that I find myself (and/or fellow fans) dropping while checking out sports spectacles in-person or on TV. And they never seem to get old…
10. “I must break you.” (Ivan Drago, Rocky)
Admittedly, it’s rare that this one comes completely in the flow. But, once in awhile, you hear a quote from a player or coach that solicits an “I must break you” reference. And when it works, it’s money.
9. “You’re five-foot-nothin’, a hundred and nothin” (Steele, Rudy)
Yes, call it a bias, but it seems this one usually comes directly following a ridiculous and unexpected play — unexpected because the player making said play is, well, tiny. David Eckstein immediately comes to mind.
8. “The sun even shines on a dog’s ass some days.” (Sidney Deane, White Men Can’t Jump)
Often used when something happens that is so atypical that you’re not even pissed off. I’ve used this on occasion when watching the Mets and begging one of our (always reliable) closers to just throw it 95 down the plate and let (fill in career .200 hitter with no home runs) hit it over the fence. “If he does, I’ll tip my cap.” Seconds later, while tipping my cap, I’ve mused: “The sun even shines on a dog’s ass some days.”
7. “Starting defense, place at the table!” (Steve Lattimer, The Program)
OK, I’ve likely only used this
6. “Noonan! Miss it, Noonan” (Everyone, Caddyshack)
Perhaps the most widespread use and applicability across sports. Easy to inject into any pressure-packed sports moment particularly clutch putts and free throws. Miss it Noonan was made for free-throws.
5. “Sweep the leg/Put him in a body bag, Johnny!” (Karate Kid)
I like to reserve this for when Frankie Rodriguez enters the game nowadays. Unfortunately, yelling any such quotes when prior Mets closers emerged from the pen was just plain silliness (see: Looper, Benitez). Now…much fun.
4. “It’s in the hole!” (Carl Spackler, Caddyshack)
In theory, perfect for golf and very little else. However, Carl Spackler quotes make themselves flexible enough for any situation.
3. “Don’t think this one has the distance…” (Jake Taylor, Major League)
Used in exactly the same manner as the movie…on a pop up to the catcher. Nothing more, nothing less. Yet, every time a backstop turns toward the stands behind home plate and puts his glove in the air I find myself muttering…
2. “It’s too high…” (Wahoo Drum Crew, Major League)
The fact that I can’t find a clip of this is the biggest Internet travesty in recent memory. Let’s just say every ball that’s a no-doubter off the bat from the opponents at CitiField, my buddy and I turn to each other and say: “Too high.” Then we proceed with the rest of the classic exchange as if quoting it for the first time. Like grade-schoolers…”at first, I thought the trajectory…” Quite amusing always…
1. “Juuuust a bit outside.” (Harry Doyle, Major League)
Perfect for any pitcher who can’t come near the plate. Oliver Perez usually solicits a few of these per at-bat. Call me evil, but I immediately think back to a certain playoff series and pitcher every time (still big fan) I ponder real-life usage of this legendary Doyle drop. What’s underrated? The next part of the quote…”Juuuust a bit outside…tried the corner and missed.”
That’s what we got, folks. Sure, there are a half dozen more from Major League alone, but I’ll leave that to y’all. Hit us with others in the comments. Made-for-game quotes from sports movies. Holla.
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“Let’s put the women and children to bed and go looking for dinner”.
“You’re killin’ me Smalls.”
An extremely versatile quote in not only sports, but life.
“Take one for the team Dorn”
Perfect to say to your wingman when he’s forced to talk to her ugly friend
“…u are one of the guys that got us here…! skipper
“i’ll make!” jimmy chitwood
“this is top shelf, baby.” mmf
As long as you’re heavy on the Major League, how about “Strike this motherf*cker out.”
in retrospect Mr. Chairman, that and give ‘em the heater, should’ve been on there…classics
Dammit Dorn, get in front of the ball. Enough of this “Ole” bullshit.
“He really hit the shit out of that one. Anything flies that far oughtta have a damn stewardess on it, don’t you think?” (Crash Davis, Bull Durham)
“I’m listening to the fucking song!” from Slap Shot if anyone talks during the national anthem.
Not from a sports movie, per se, but "Hey, it's Enrico Pallazzo!" can be used any time a nobody with an overinflated opinion of themselves sings the National Anthem (never a kid, though).
Major League and no "Forget about the curveball…"
"Don't think, it can only hurt the ballclub."
"Fuck this fucking game."
Two from Crash Davis that can be used in many settings.
Who could forget Harry Doyle in Major League,"1-hit, that's all we got, one goddamn hit!"…(his assistant covering the mic) "you can't say 'goddamn' on the air"…(Doyle) "don't worry, nobody is listening anyway."
He's going to need a rocket up his ass to catch that one – Major League
"Are you telling me jesus christ cant hit a curve ball?"
I'll have to think that "You're killing me Smalls" has to be the most used quote I've ever heard. Just great in any situation.
Hard to use but always pulls a laugh, "Vaughn a juvenile deliquent in the offseason"
"Hit the bull." (Crash Davis, Bull Durham) Useful anytime you want somebody to do something nuts just to throw people off.
"Fuck you, Jobu. I'll do it myself." (Pedro Cerrano, Major League) I use this one all the time. Whenever I'm getting frustrated about screwing something up and am now so determined my head might pop.
you're killin' me, smalls, should've made the cut. good call multiple smart people
Awesome topic. Just another idea…
I love Alvin Mack in The Program, so I try to use his quotes as often as possible
"You're the guy who shot my mother aren't you?" Followed up by "I'm gonna bust your guy open and WATCH YOU DIE!"
"You're about to have 250 lbs of pissed of nigga up yo ass"
The best one though…is whenever anyone is asking about history, geography or even sports teams…just say "I don't know…Detroit and Buffalo?"
Another Harry Doyle classic, use this all the time…
"Got to give him credit for putting himself in front of that rocket"
see this shoe? it says adidas.
"What's that make them?"
"Lollygaggers."
"Dynamite drop-in Monty! That broadcast school has really paid off!"
"Bring that shit to me, mon!"
"KY-ball"
"Vasoline ball"
"Nice Catch, Hayes. Don't ever fuckin' do it again."
"Predictions? Pain." Clubber Lang, Rocky III.
"Hey Bartender, Jobu needs a refill!"
Never gets old
"You got that shot, Cup. that's a hooded 4-Iron.
Meeting with Rachel Phelps going over who will be invited to spring training in Major League
" I never heard of half of these guys, and the ones I heard of are way past their prime."
"some of these guys never had a prime"
"this guy here is dead"
"well cross him off them"
You just hit that guy!
He shouldn't have been standing there.
Happy Gilmore
I look like a banker in this – Rick Vaughn (At dinner after making the team wearing a leather vest with no sleeves and a tie)
"Rose goes in the front, big guy!"
Crash Davis
Hard to put into any conversation, i've mostly used it when correcting uniform deficiencies of my Soldiers.
[to Rexman] Hey, Rexman! Hell of a situation we got here. Two on, two out, your team down a run and you've got the chance to be the hero on national television… if you don't blow it. Saw your wife at the Capri Lounge last night. Hell of a dancer. You should be very very proud. Oh, and that guy she was with? I'm sure he's a close personal friend and all, but tell me, what was he doing wearing her panties on his head? [Rexman pops the ball straight up] Uh-oh, Rexie, I don't think this one's got the distance.
Another one from the Ivan Drago "Rocky" film, when they're having the press conference to show how hard Drago punches:
"Whatever he hits… he destroys!"
Useful on Ryan Howard and Albert Pujols homers, players getting de-cleated in football, power strikes in bowling, 300-yard drives on the golf course, etc.
@ Kevin. Brilliant. Can't believe I hadn't thought of that one before. will immediately insert into rotation
From Caddyshack:
You'll get nothing–and like it!
(Judge Smalls to his nephew)
and the best sports movie quote of all time (from Jerry Maguire)
Kelly Preston when up against the refridgerator:
Don't ever stop f—ing me!
"It was outta my reach. What do you want me to do, dive for it?
"Strike this mother fucker out." ~Major League (good for any time a pitcher is sweating it out on the mound and needs a tough K).
Almost as good is the T.V. edited version of this quote: "Strike this guuuuy out."
"Do you believe in miracles? Yes!"
Ummm how about
"The Price is Wroooong Bitch!"
youtube : Major League 1 part 4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-TOdqyQwsQA&NR=1
7:40 mark – too high……
Kevin. serious sleuthing sir.
"Ain't so bad! Ain't so bad!" – From Rocky 3 during the second Lang fight. probably better used for trash talk, especially for an opponent who thinks he's hot shit.
"Fuck it dude, Lets go Bowling"
Or "He's getting beat like he stole something" – from Remember the Titans
you can't do dat….never never. If you do dat you go to the penalty box…and you feel shame.
The french Canadian goalie from Slap Shot
Be the ball
Gambling is illegal at Bushwood … and I never slice.
I held it like an egg. Yeah, and the son of a bitch scrambled it.
"Are you crying? There's no crying in Baseball!" 'League of Their Own'
After a beautiful TD or a long HR … from Mr. Miyagi …
"If do right, no can defence"
Like someone already said, any tense moment before a play – FG attempt, FT attempt, putt, pitch …
"Be the ball"
Any time your on the golf course you can use numerous Happy Gilmore quotes:
Shooter McGavin: Damn you people. Go back to your shanties.
Happy Gilmore: Looks like a slight hill. Whaddya think?
Otto: And a slant to the left.
Happy Gilmore: Nah, it looks that way cause you've only got one shoe on.
Happy Gilmore: [to his golf ball] You little son of a bitch ball! Why you don't you just go HOME? That's your HOME! Are you too good for your HOME? ANSWER ME! SUCK MY WHITE A**, BALL!
Happy Gilmore: [to Shooter] Happy learned how to putt! Uh-oh!
Shooter McGavin: [to the spectators] Damn you people. This is golf. Not a rock concert.
Mr. Larson: That's two thus far, Shooter.
Shooter McGavin: Oh, you can count. Good for you.
Mr. Larson: And *you* can count, on *me*, waiting for *you* in the parking lot.
Shooter McGavin: Thank you, Doug. You know, I saw Doug playing yesterday. And I've got to tell you, this guy spends more time in the sand than David Hasselhoff!
Donald: Hey Gilmore, you suck ya jackass.
Happy Gilmore: [to Shooter after hitting a longer drive] Somebody's closer!
Gary Potter: Harness in the good energy, block out the bad. Harness. Energy. Block. Bad. It's like a carousel. You put the quarter in, you get on the horse, it goes up and down, and around. Circular, circle. Feel it. Go with the flow.
Mr. Larson: Trying to reach the green from here, Shooter?
Shooter McGavin: I'm afraid that's impossible, sir.
Mr. Larson: I beg to differ. Happy Gilmore accomplished that feat no more than an hour ago.
Shooter McGavin: Well, moron…
[turns to see Mr. Larson for the first time]
Shooter McGavin: good for Happy Gilm-OH MY GOD!
fly ball, caught.
fly ball, caught.
fly ball, caught.
My favs to use:
"I ain't seen the floater pitch since Scuffy McGee!" from Rookie of the Year when I'm watching basketball.
"You play ball like a girrrlll!" from The Sandlot whenever someone on my favorite teams sucks (ala Gabe Gross with the Rays or Dan Kolb when he was with the Braves)
and "That'll do pig. That'll do." from The Replacements
When ever your team calls a timeout to set up a play it's your opportunity to-go-all Dennis Hopper in Hoosiers and suggest the following: "Run the picket fence!"
When team is ready to play remind them, "Don't get caught watchin' the paint dry."
"Too high" is my favorite though…I clearly surround myself with the wrong people, no idea what I'm saying…ever.
+1 to Save Ferris. Miyagi-son quote = money.
Not really a sports movie but the scene is related to Sport.
Player gets taken off the field and announcers begin to speculate that it's a cramp: Use the college swim meet scene in Rodney Dangerfield's Back To School…"It must be menstrual."
People in the know should then reply "Screw you Melon"
"ARE YOU CRYING? There's no crying! THERE'S NO CRYING IN BASEBALL!"
Used when I see anyone from the left half of the Yankees infield.
Use this if someone refuses to do something you ask them to do(From "Any Given Sunday" when James Woods tells his cheerleader girlfriend to leave with him and she refuses):
"Fine, stay here and get buttfucked by 12 Neanderthals!"
Happy gilmore
Somebody is clooooseerrr
The Movie Sidekicks:
"I don't need karate gee for brick-breaking"
"Is That Red Or White Wine With Bricks?"