Jennie Finch is Like Vintage Big Unit on the Mound…in Some Ways

Anyway, back to the softball. More specifically, back to Jennie Finch. Now, you’d have to be buried far beneath the work not to follow sports as a young male and not have somehow stumbled on maybe a story or mention somehwere of this Finch character. But, I’ll be honest…I can’t recall ever actually sitting and watching her pitch over multiple innings. Two basic observations from watching only two innings of work.

First off, she is nasty. Her stuff. The change-up, riseball, all that sh*t. Filthy. Came into yesterday’s game in relief and tossed 11Ks in four innings of work. She is also crazy intense on the mound and just has that look that you see in somebody like a Paps or a Unit. Just crazy-focused and an absolute gamer. A lot of the other girls look like they’re just out there “playing.” She looks every second like she’s competing. You pick this up watching one batter. I know some of you think I’m crazy (for even talking U.S. softball right now), but I’m telling you.

Second, she looks like Manute-freakin’-Bol on the non-hill. In terms of the height. She’s actually significantly better looking than Manute Bol. It’s also a very good thing the bump is on level ground in the ladies’ game otherwise she would frighten off children. She really did remind me of Randy Johnson on the mound in that respect. She towers over people. My first thought was “how tall is this woman?” Answer: 6’0. This partly explains why she looks like a 17 year-old camp counselor ushering around a bunch of 12 year-old girls at sleepaway camp.

By my precise math, I’ve decided that Finch towers over her peers in much the same way Randy Johnson does when he steps on the diamond – maybe to an even greater degree. Finch can also hurl that thing much like the Big Unit. Physical appearance is where any similarities quickly cease.