Tyson Knocks Out Paparrazzi, Transports Me Back to the McNeeley Death Stare

So, Mike Tyson apparently knocked down (or out) a paparazzi at LAX earlier this evening. My only thought? Of all the people to f with in the entire celebrity world, there might be no human being I’d be more frightened about provoking than Mike Tyson.

As a child of the 80s, Iron Mike was literally the scariest man on the planet. And forever, no matter that his career spanned decades, that sentiment was best articulated in one solitary moment (at least for me). Some of you may recall watching this fight. This is not hyperbole. I will never forget it.

Tyson came back from his prison stint in 1995 and, in his first bout, stepped into the ring against a man named Peter McNeeley. Those who know anything about boxing, as well as those who know absolutely nothing about boxing, could figure out long before the boxers stepped in the ring that this fight was going to be a joke.

The end result was a Tyson knockout in 89 seconds. Still, the indelible image for me was the center ring instructions before a single punch was thrown. I’ll never forget seeing McNeeley bounce around with that goofy grin and Tyson’s eyes just following him from side-to-side with that killer stare. Once they refs sent them to their respective corners, I remember immediately thinking to myself: “this poor man is going to die.” Fortunately, the bout didn’t last long enough for McNeeley to meet his maker. Regardless, that stare has stayed with me ever since (the 2:15 mark signifies official crap-in-your-pants time).

While we’re in the McNeeley archives, this is pretty hilarious just on the side. “Medfield!”