Get to Your TV! It’s the NFL Schedule Special!

Ohhh, the Wonder!

Really? Are we serious, people? A two-hour f-in special? On schedules?

Hey, I’m just as big a gridiron fan as the next guy. I usually try to make at least one trip a year to see the Jets on the road and am eager to see when they’ll be playing at Seattle and San Diego in anticipation of potential West Coast visiting fan debauchery. But isn’t a dedicated two-hour special on the network going a bit overboard?

Sure, football is America’s favorite sport, and the best viewing experience on the planet, but this is mildly insane. The drama! The suspense! Oh, the analysis! I can’t believe I’ll be stuck at my desk and have to miss it all.

ESPN Anchor miraculously managing to convey real interest:
“Carolina does look to have a rough middle stretch of the season there on the back end of that bye week, don’t you think?”

Merril Hoge, Golic or Other Ex-Baller:
“Absolutely. You go to New Orleans, which is never an easy place to play, and then another in-division game against the Bucs at the Sombrero. This two-game stretch could make or break the Panthers season.”

Spare me.

What’s next from the folks in Bristol? Live one-hour announcement coverage of the WNBA All-Star selections?

While we’re off in absurd fantasy land, why not just host a multi-hour GameDay telecast from Gainesville around a Florida Gators spring game (otherwise known as a scrimmage)? Wait a second, you’re kidding me, right

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About the Author: Cecilio's Scribe is the founder of The Legend of Cecilio Guante and a generally pessimistic fan of the Mets, Jets, Knicks and Rangers. A fine NYC-based gentlemen who hones his marketing skills as his primary trade by day. Husband, chef, father of a newborn and after-hours blogger by night. Proud alum of the mighty Big Red of Cornell. University. Hot sauce devotee. Staunch protester of the continued wussifcation of American sports. Sometimes I rhyme slow, sometimes I rhyme quick.

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  1. andyl says:

    This 2 hour special is for people who have nothing to do with themselves. Couldn’t agree more.

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