The Wonders of Shaq’s Scrabble Board


I depend on ESPN for honesty, integrity and dependability – not just in their reporting and programming but also their commercials. And I love the Shaq NBA spot. Can’t get enough. It’s like one of those movies that just gets funnier every time you watch it. Shaqtastic. Twenty-nine points. “S,” what do you know? Shaqtus. Sterling delivery by the big man. Academy-award winning supporting roles from Stu and Breen (who has established his acting chops admirably in the past) as well.

Yet despite seeing and embracing the big man’s performance countless times, I only recently saw the “longer” version that includes a quick shot of the Scrabble board. Perhaps I’m late to the party. The board is at once inspiring and slightly problematic. First, the good. We get a sneak peek at the other Shaq-creations in this Shaqglorious edition of the commercial including:

  • SHAQATTACK (obviously)
  • SHAQALICI (one can only assume the plural of shaqalicious? if one could make plurals of adjectives)
  • SHAQESQUE (brilliant)
  • SHAQFU (a given)
  • SHAQZILSA (starting to take creative latitude a bit too far here, Mr. O’Neal…we would have given you SHAQZILLA)
  • SHAQTASTIC (indeed)

For those keeping track at home, that’s seven Q’s. Damn right, I’d be wondering how we got that many too. Here’s what bothers me about it, though. First off, where is he going to put “Shaqtus.” There’s simply not even enough room on the board. Not to mention eight Q’s is simply preposterous. Secondly, am I missing something on the top right of the board? Is K-I-S a word? If not, this whole Scrabble board is a complete travishammockery.

Maybe this is all old news to some of you Internets hounds. If not, please share your thoughts and insight on what was a startling new development to me…and enjoy this gem again in all its splendor.

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About the Author: Cecilio's Scribe is the founder of The Legend of Cecilio Guante and a generally pessimistic fan of the Mets, Jets, Knicks and Rangers. A fine NYC-based gentlemen who hones his marketing skills as his primary trade by day. Husband, chef, father of a newborn and after-hours blogger by night. Proud alum of the mighty Big Red of Cornell. University. Hot sauce devotee. Staunch protester of the continued wussifcation of American sports. Sometimes I rhyme slow, sometimes I rhyme quick.

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  1. Anonymous says:

    The entire game is a shammockery. They aren’t even connecting the words correctly. It’s like Shaq just picks a spot on the board to start spelling out words, regardless if they connect to other words or not. Cheater!!!!

  2. P-Cat says:

    Baby Got Shaq
    Shaq Jacket
    Shaq & Field

    You got any others?

  3. Cecilio's Scribe says:

    Shaqtual. shiquy-shaq. tic-shaq-toe. shaq truck. OK, i’m embarrassing myself now

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